chickenfickle

I have been giving this some thought and I would like to be your friend. Not your “We haven’t talked in 20 years but I saw your name on a popular social media site” friend, but a friend. There’s one catch, though-I’m “as is.” Yep, you have to take me like this.

And what is “this” you ask? Well, it’s everything you want in a friend and everything you don’t. It’s all my baggage and then some. But, here’s the great thing about being a friend. You can ignore a whole big bunch of that stuff. Yes, that’s right. Why? ‘Cuz we’re friends.

When you are friends with someone, and they act nuts, you have a choice. You can say, you are being nuts and move on. Or you can get all in a snit and not be able to move on. I’d like you to stay on as a friend but move on from the nuttiness. We’ve got lots more in our future but we’ll never get there if you stay stuck in the past. Why? ‘Cuz we’re friends.

Now, let’s talk time commitment. I’m going to be honest here and tell you that I don’t have much time to give you. But, as my friend, you understand that and probably don’t mind because you are busy, too. So when I put my kids and husband before you and we don’t talk for a month, don’t be pissy. When I get two minutes, you’ll be the one I call. And when I get your voicemail and you don’t call me back for two weeks, that’s cool, too. Why? ‘Cuz we’re friends.

Also, we aren’t going to agree on everything. But the great thing about being a friend is that we don’t have to. You can have your opinions (and they can be dumb) and I can have mine (which are completely right in every way) and we can choose to disagree but defend each other’s right to have them. Why? ‘Cuz we’re friends, you moron.

So, I guess what I’m trying to say here is that being my friend is going to be hard, but I hope you consider it. I have a lot to offer. I’m funny. No, really, I am. I can cook, too. And, I know everything. That’s how I know you should be my friend.