chickenfickle

I have a dog and he’s 11 years old now. I’ve noticed this year that he’s suddenly gray around his muzzle and he doesn’t act like a puppy anymore. Lately, he’s been enjoying the hellish heat and likes to just lay outside on the black driveway. I guess the air conditioning is too much for him. He sleeps late in the morning, spends most of his day asleep, and goes to sleep early. I’d like to come back as him in my next life except for one thing-he snores.

He’s always snored (and farted and chased cats) but this year, it has gotten really bad. I used to be able to say, Hey, Bailey, be quiet and he’d give out one last grunt and be done. But no more. He’s like a little old man who sleeps on a round cushion next to my side of the bed. I actually kicked him out a couple months ago. I put his bed outside our door. I slept like a baby for weeks. But slowly, he made his way back in. At first, he would lay inside the doorway, then he moved into the closet. I told Husband to put his bed in the closet but he didn’t want the clothes to smell of Eau de Canine. So Bailey has just been moving closer to his old spot, next to me. And over the past couple weeks we’ve had some bad storms and he seemed so sad, that when Husband moved his bed back in, I didn’t argue. I caved and let the snorer return.

But I can’t sleep at all. He serenades me with his snores, snorts, sniffs. I toss and turn all night. He sleeps great, that big stinky snorer. All snuggled in his bed, back in his spot, next to me. I finally fall asleep around 5am but I have to get up at 8 to get the girl to summer camp-he sleeps till 11! In fact, he’s sleeping right now. Grrr…..

Now, don’t get me wrong. He’s a great dog. He’s been with us for a long time, lived in all our houses, moved from one state to another. He tolerates #3 pulling his ears and tail. He’s a good watch dog, too. I know when the mail comes or the wind blows. But the snoring, oh, if they made those nose strips for dogs, I’d totally buy them. I’d wrap duct tape on his snout if I thought it would work. I looked online for some info and the suggestion was to stop smoking around your dog. It’s not like Bailey and I light up stogies together at night. Another was to get him a pillow to elevate his head. Shall I get him some pajamas, too? Perhaps a glass of warm milk? I just want him to stop snoring.

So what should I do? I could try to go sleep before him (not likely.) I could try some earplugs (that’s stupid, I know.) He’s 77 years old. He’s not going to change. But, I haven’t slept right since these three kids were born so I guess I can get through this, too. Sadly, I know he won’t be here much longer and then I’ll miss his snoring.

He was my first kid, after all.